@TuffyNyC: Losing your phone is the adult version of having your balloon fly away.
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@JasonLastname: As the officer approached my car I took a big pull of helium from the balloon and started crying
@Brianhopecomedy: I'm working out again in hopes that I can wear my superhero shirt in public without someone saying, "Batman really let himself go".
@BuckyIsotope: Only 1490's kids will remember this *sails from Europe and destroys an indigenous population*