@KellieMounce: "Lost Unicorn...if found please stop doing drugs."
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@dafloydsta: WIFE: Where's the dog? *flashback to me giving him the keys to the car to get more beer* ME: I let him outside.
@beefman138: Wife : The neighbours are banging on our front door again. Me : Why can't they do it in a bed, like normal people?
@merewillis: My husband showed me beautiful flowers on his phone & said, "Look, I got you some flowers." So I put them in a vase of water. #LastLaugh