@Gre_Gone: [loudly in front of a bunch of ducks] "OH NO I SEEM TO HAVE BROUGHT TOO MUCH BREAD WITH ME WHATEVER SHALL I DO?" *ducks try to play it cool*
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@SatansTongue: *at a concert* ARE YOU GUYS READY TO ROCK (Crowd) "YEAAAAH" LETS DO THIS HIT IT *30 second ad plays first*
@WilliamAder: Shutdown Apocalypse Update: Hearing now that the government closed the Grand Canyon. Not sure if they roll a tarp over it or how that works.
@primawesome: A lady just walked into Taco Bell, dumped every hot sauce packet in her bag and left. I should follow her. What's the rest of her day like?
@DzNutz83: Heard the local weatherman say, "high in the thirties" & now I know the title to my autobiography.