@GuyConfused: Love my pillow so much because it doesn't leave my house in the morning after spending the night with me.
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@louisvirtel: The worst scene in La La Land is when Emma Stone gives Ryan Gosling permission to save jazz because she already solved racism in The Help.
@AndyAsAdjective: "any ideas?" let's tie a bunch of helium balloons together & then hold onto the strings "whoa whoa whoa, let's not get carried away"
@doktorj: Enhanced interrogation idea: If waterboarding isn't working, try having my mother brush their hair.
@TheRobCee: Lost my job naming hurricanes after 3 ex-girlfriends called & complained. In hindsight, including their last names may have been a bad idea.