@Jake1000001: Love will tear us apart. Also, bears, wolves and some other woodland creatures.
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@SufficientCharm: A fun way to give your man a little scare is to ask him, "Do you know what tomorrow is?" and watch the panic set in.
@ComedicBust: My uber driver's looking at me like he's never seen anyone eat a bowl of cereal in the back of his car before.
@brennadine: I'VE GOT GOATLIKE SPEED & REFLEXES "Don't you mean catlike-" BAAAH [Climbs on top of roof and begins eating shingles]
@artsofdrawing: *During math test* My answer: 28. Answer choices: 17, 19, 26, 45. Me: "well 26 is closer to 28, so that must be the answer."