@TheCatWhisprer: Made it to the level of old where I turned down a beer so it wouldn't mess with the aftertaste of the milkshake I just had.
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@robdelaney: My niece just said "Birds live in a birdhouse & we live in a people house!" Cute, huh? Wrong; my niece is 26 & on trial for manslaughter.
@wickedsuga: This kid in target fell on the ground screaming bc his mom wouldn't buy him candy & now she's yelling for us both to get up and be quiet.
@coIIegestudentz: College parties are great: You're taking shots with future doctors and the next Supreme Court judge is throwing up in the bathroom.
@WeissBrandon: Me: I'm going bungee jumping Mom: y? Me: my friend John is Mom: so if John jumped off of a bridge, would you? Me: that's what I just told u