@loribuckmajor: Made plans to exercise with a friend and now I have to go get in a car accident.
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@jergarl: Wife:How'd you sleep? Me: Fine except I got in a gun fight and died and went to the store because I ran out of shampoo W: Ambien:*giggles
@ThePocketJustin: Don't you hate it when you misjudge a moment of silence and lean in for a kiss. Worst police interrogation ever.
@NYC_Blonde: I only sleep with my laptop so that if I ever get a boyfriend I'll be used to sharing the bed
@TravLeBlanc: Mary and Joseph chose to have Jesus in a barn rather than spend Christmas with their families.