@Breadery: Magneto spent his high school years dating girls with braces.
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@HollyHeals: I'm doing it doggy style today. Lying on the couch not doing a damn thing. I will bark if you knock on the door.
@badbanana: If you're about to be turned into stone by Medusa, strike a hilarious pose and at least lighten things up for the next guy.
@stuckinaportal: look son, i kinda need you to go to hong kong & win a martial arts tournament to the death for me because i sorta told my neighbor you did
@markleggett: Celebrities are so rich because they save money every time they attend a movie premiere for free.