@amydillon: [maintains eye contact while slowly rearranging the dishwasher]
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@david8hughes: [at the mall] "I've lost my son. Can you make an announcement for me?" "Sure, what's his name?" "Xander." "See, that's why he ran off."
@whereami18: I hope my kids love the gifts they receive for Christmas so I'll have more things to take away when I need to punish them
@iamburtjarvis: british waiter: what topping would ye fancy on yer pizza? british guy: tea british waiter: jolly good choice [both laugh britishingly]
@KevinBuffalo: I told my daughter we might be getting a blizzard and she asked for one with Reese's pieces