@MariyaAlexander: Make a horror film less scary by putting old timey words in the title, i.e. The Thingamabob, Jason Goes To Heck or The Hills Have Peepers.
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@Contwixt: If you tell me your kid is 22 months and I buy it a beer, that's on you. That is your bad.
@Iwriteforcats: THE HORROR! *splat THE TRAGEDY! *splat IT'S AWFUL! *splat SO MUCH BLOOD! *splat WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?! *splat -It's raining men.
@TheCatWhisprer: *wife grabs my wrist as I go overboard* Her: You're... slipping... Me: Pretend I'm the covers. *she easily pulls me to safety with one arm*
@SteveKoehler22: Why do countries "cut ties" when things get tense ? So weird having men walk around in suits and half ties.