@_wangwe: Make her feel like she's the only woman on earth. Because nothing makes women happier than feeling like all other women are dead.
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@QwertyJones3: [doctor hooking wires to my chest] ME: What are you doing? DOC: Echocardiogram ME: cardiogram cardiogram cardiogram this is a weird test
@msdanifernandez: If you liked "These Boots Are Made for Walkin" youll enjoy other hits like "This Toaster Toasts Things" and "Whats the Phone Number for 911"
@robdelaney: Imagine your relief if you had a dream your daughter was dating a DJ then woke up & remembered she was dating a ferris wheel operator.