@shot_of_cabo: Make it a Great Friday by not getting nailed to a cross.
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@Manda_like_wine: 1000s flocked to NJ to see the Virgin Mary in a tree trunk. But, don't judge them, friends. When was the last time you saw a virgin in NJ?
@iQuoteComedy: Girl: "Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?" Guy: "Both, now get in the van."
@DrDogMD: PATIENT: I've been so stressed out lately. What can I do? DR DOG (tail wagging like crazy): Studies show that petting dogs relieve stress