@BradBroaddus: Make sure your blind date from the internet has a big car. Nothing worse than a trunk with no leg room.
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@IanDouglasTerry: Dude yelled "Fight me like a man" at me, so I held him down and marginalized him for a thousand years.
@kcmoore51: I love getting kisses from my dogs but, I'm starting to worry about the one who keeps trying to give me the slow tongue.
@MoistPork: Men: Don't lie to your woman, she'll catch you. Don't tell her the truth, she'll be pissed. Just pray for a brick to fall on your head.