@UnluckyBrian: Makes eye contact with female. Medusa.
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@Reverend_Scott: I only drink Smart Water now. I think it's really helping my... my head thinking thingie.
@WilliamAder: A thing I learned at this week's staff meeting is that I have restless leg syndrome when I sleep.
@faisaladam_: In Soviet Russia a bar walks into men. The case of the man-killing-bar remains unsolved.
@seamussaid: my daughter hones her survival instincts by forgoing the provided bowl and spreading goldfish crackers all over the house to forage & store