@RegularFred: Man dies after body rejects sleeveless Metallica shirt because he didn't have a barbed wire tattoo.
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@RidiculousSheri: He died doing what he loved, annoying the hell out of me and not believing I would stab him.
@kwirkyKerri: Facebook tells me those vans are dangerous, but Twitter says they have candy. So conflicted.
@pixelatedboat: Ronald McDonald kills millions of cows and he's the world's most beloved clown, but I butcher one and I "ruined your son's birthday party"?