@Tmoney68: Man, my 84-year-old neighbor must REALLY like working on his car. He's been under there changing the oil for 3 days.
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@_troyjohnson: Ugly Duckling is my favorite story that teaches kids it's okay to look weird for a while as long as u get ur act together and become hot.
@Reverend_Scott: [job interview] How would you improve our business? "Dude, I'd bankrupt you in a week. I'm just catchin Pokemon in your office."
@robin_991: The scariest moment in the world is when a 3yo looks at you and says CLOSE YOUR EYES AND OPEN YOUR MOUTH
@pyepar: Left home on Friday night, got bck home on Monday night. Grandma: U kids dnt knw hw 2 party, wen I ws ur age, I'd come back after a month