@trevso_electric: Man who looks forward to spending his entire life with Kim Kardashian disagrees with Grammy decision.
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@CoopSoSarc: We decided to go out for bbq tonight. As it turns out, I'm too immature to discuss how to smoke your meat with strangers.
@sucittaM: My wife thinks I'm stupid for using Twitter so much. But I think she's stupid for marrying me, so I think we all know who won this argument.
@inmynewskin: Let your girlfriend know how much you love her by screeching loudly like a pterodactyl whenever she talks.
@pinupteacher: All I'm saying is God wouldn't have given me this wild hair if he didn't want me to store stuff in it. *baby hedgehog peaks out*