@ElleOhHell: Many English names are derived from occupations, like Fletcher (arrow maker), Cooper (barrel maker), or Cunningham (tricky pig).
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@GoldenSpirals: 'Twas the night before Christmas, and everyone knew, you were still out shopping, yes, it sucks to be you.
@myonlymizztake: When a CW is coming out of the men's room as I walk past, I always ask if everything went well because that's the polite thing to do.
@sucittaM: When I see people running to catch the elevator I'm on I yell "HURRY! YOU GOTTA SMELL THIS!".