@EliTerry: Many people are surprised to hear I'm married because I scream it at them as I descend from their broken skylight in the dead of night.
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@WittySassBasket: I held up a fist for a CW to bump and she kissed my ring. I am now drunk on power and no one is allowed to make eye contact.
@DanMentos: who called it carrying your cell phone in your front pocket instead of hot signals in your area
@BlairLoudly: I decided to watch The Conjuring alone in a dark apartment and now I'm not allowed to make my own decisions anymore.