@Georoyo: Marc Anthony jeans at Kohl's come in three cuts - tuberculosis, heroin addict and skeletor.
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@KalvinMacleod: Do you have to go to the bathroom? No You sure? Yes How about now? No Now? No [movie begins] Daddy? FOR CRYING OUT LOUD
@Rollinintheseat: Friend: "I'm breaking up with my boyfriend. He acts like a savage." Me: "Fred or Ben?"
@TommyKarate: I hate it when I get my days mixed up and I accidentally take my stupid wife out instead of my girlfriend.
@JODYHiGHROLLER: i NEVER VOTED FOR A PRESiDENT BECUZ iF iM GUNNA WASTE MY GAS THEN iT BETTER BE ON SOMETHiNG iMPORTANT LiKE DRiViNG TO CHiCK-FiL-A