@Jenny4ashley: Marijuana doesn't kill your brain cells. You're just an idiot.
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@Ristolable: "DO NOT HIT ME. THE TURTLES DO NOT HIT SPLINTER. I AM SPLINTER TO YOU." -real thing I just said to my son
@BritXNic: "Alcohol doesn't affect me" *Wakes up with cornrows, a light saber and two taxidermy lizards*
@NicestHippo: Two ads? IN A ROW? On this website that gives me access to all the music ever made? I won't stand for it
@RocketRankoon: [5 minutes after being trapped in an elevator] Finally, an excuse to drink my own urine