@GeorgeTakei: Marriage equality AND marijuana laws passed? Now we know what Leviticus really meant by "A man who layeth with another man must be stoned."
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@Ideal_Victoria: *experiences all five stages of grief while the waiter walks by my table with what I thought was my dinner*
@Parkerlawyer: I made a grown man cry today in court. But yet I can't get my kids to clean their damn rooms.
@BreadFoster: I "pet zone" girls. It's like the friend zone, but, I only hang out if your dog will be there.