@sammyrhodes: Marriage is like wine. It gets better with age. Also it makes you say things you regret.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Brianhopecomedy: My wife and I are walking through Central Park and pointing out all of the places that we remember seeing dead bodies on Law & Order.
@TheTweetOfGod: NEW EXPRESSIONS "Kanye bless you." "Kanye damn it!" "One nation, under Kanye." "Thank Kanye Almighty!" "The Kanyefather, Part II"
@jordanalexissss: sober in uber: please stop talking to me drunk in uber: ...and that Mike, is why I'm emotionally unavailable I suppose.