@sammyrhodes: Marriage is like wine. It gets better with age. Also it makes you say things you regret.
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@PaperWash: I'm sorry son, but autocorrect keeps changing your name to Marty. That's your new name now, there's nothing we can do about it.
@FatherWithTwins: I like to torture my kids by buying them a new Xbox game, and then taking them to the zoo all day.
@robfee: Cons of being on The Walking Dead: Almost everyone you know is dead & the world is a desolate zombie wasteland Pros: No more Adobe updates!
@Sarcasticsapien: Coworker: If you had to do it all over again, would you? Me: Yeah. Cw: You would? Why? Me: Because I know what the words "had to" means.