@amydillon: Married foreplay is just five minutes of confusion about whether your spouse is using a suggestive euphemism or asking you to do a chore.
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@Boba_Photo: $1,000/hour for an escort? No thanks. I've been crossing the street by myself for free since I was 6.
@lovemyboots111: Sometimes when you first meet someone you just know you want to spend the rest of your life.... Avoiding them
@Kyle_Raney: Subway Guy: Enjoy your sandwich Me: You too! Subway Guy: Me: Me: *gives him my sandwich* this is yours now