@MoneypennyNaked: Married girls are so lucky. They can post anything they want on here because they already tricked some dumb guy into marrying them.
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@bourgeoisalien: Holiday tip: remember, you only have a few days left to drop out of people's lives to avoid buying gifts. You're welcome.
@equinelover137: A guy just commented on how classy I am So naturally I removed my finger from my nose so I could type, "Thank you!"
@fanofhell: guy: hey that's a great truck. what kinda engine? me: [rubbing the hood] it's got a truck engine
@rachel2manypaws: The toughest part of any long distance relationship is the 6 hour drive to slash their tires.