@TheAlexP: Married men aren't allowed to go the grocery store alone because we're the kid in the shopping cart, but with money
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@RamblingMachine: A truck with the slogan "We always go the extra mile" took the last parking spot so I wrote on it "because we missed the exit" as a revenge.
@mejustbeth: Weather man said all you need today is sunglasses and sunscreen but I think I'll put some clothes on too.
@Hellaphantitis: "So let's name the turtles after the most influential artists and their sensei we'll name after this lil piece of wood stuck in my foot"