@citizenkawala: Married With Children is a hilarious sitcom until you’re 35 and realise it’s a chilling documentary.
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@thesulk: "Wanna pop a xanax in the Civic and kayak with mom and dad at noon?" "Can't. Scared." "Of the water?" "No. Palindromes."
@bigmacher: Milk prices could reach as high as $8/gallon soon & at those prices I'm giving everyone the OK to cry if you spill some.
@JanineEB4: My biggest regret to date is probably never telling Kary C, Kerri B, Cari R and Kerry L from 4th grade that their names were spelled wrong..
@longwall26: Scary: A wolf chasing you Scarier: A werewolf chasing you Scariest: A werewolf with a clipboard chasing you