If bad ads/pop-ups are redirecting you, please take a screenshot and email it to [email protected]. Help us keep the site clean!
@AntiJokeCat: Mary had a little lamb.
The doctor fainted.
@NamestartswithZ: ME IN 2010: My prospects for the future are bright and I am focused on them
ME IN 2017: I'm going to tweet about a raccoon who outwits me
@Thynebear: [first date at a chinese restaurant]
"So are you more of a dog or a cat person?"
*reading menu* I was thinking orange chicken but you do you
@oxygenplug: *you see a bear approaching you*
Quick play dead!
*bears comes running up*
Oh god! OH GOD! What's happening!? Wake up! WHO DID THIS TO YOU!?
@iwearaonesie: [dad accidentally steps on the dog]
I'm sorry girl, I didn't see you. Are you ok?
[dad accidentally steps on me]
Why are you on the floor?!
@nickwiger: The physicians choice for headaches induced by choppy streaming video playback