@mellimelle: Match dot com, but for socks.
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@TheTweetOfGod: Attention crazy man on the subway: this is God. Please start telling everyone else in the car what I'm saying to you.
@Schmoodles: Me: When does karaoke start? Him: Never. Me: But I put my "I ? Karaoke" t-shirt on. Him: We noticed. Me: This is the worst funeral ever.