@zzoker: Mathematics is the only place you can buy 60 watermelons and no one questions you
@AmnesiaRose: Yes you impress me. But so does a squirrel crossing a telephone wire.
@Parentpains: She said she was burning with desire, so I threw a bucket of water at her.
Dating is bullshit.
@RdrJay47: A social gathering without food is called a "Don't."
@ninjadinosaur1: The priest said that the demon really wants to leave, but I'm way too clingy, so the exorcism didn't work.
@AdamUrbane: If you lose a tooth as an adult, the tooth fairy gives you a trailer.