@adamrensch: Matthew McConaughay is for Matthew McConaughorses
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@jakob_huber: "Get me another beer, boy" "Dad I'm an adult. My name's Bobby" "It's time you knew the truth boy. The 2nd & 3rd B's in your name are silent"
@vikkaroni: You're never too old to throw random shit in people's shopping carts when they aren't looking.
@YesImMatt: A woman could tweet "My dog just died" and she would get replies like "Well, I'm not dead ;)"