@ShittingtonUK: Maybe Hitler started WWII after being constantly attacked by time travelers.
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@PetePsquared: Bought a bag of Sweetheart candies & cracked my tooth on one.When I spit it out & looked at it,itsaid "Next time call when you say you will"
@Sal0630: My girl must be planning a big April fools joke or something. She's been agreeing w/ me all morning. Either that or she got mad cow disease.
@JohnLyonTweets: Her: You have selective hearing. You never hear criticism and only hear things that make you look good. Me: Thanks, you look good too.