@TheMainlandBlog: Maybe if I do the opposite and let my kids eat off the floor, more food would end up on the table.
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@houffy: I don't think the church is going to let me pick music for the bible group again. In my defense, the band name "Lamb of God" is misleading.
@gobmentcheese: In a crowded elevator, tell all the tall people they have to get in the back because you're going to take a group photo.
@Eightinchgoat: Worst things about mid 40's: 1. Catching a view of yourself naked in the mirror. 2. Crying too hard to complete this list.