@jackiembouvier: Maybe, if I sit very still, this nice family at Olive Garden won't notice that I'm sitting at their table eating their bread sticks.
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@Book_Krazy: I just found out that all the different colors in Fruit Loops are the same flavor, and now I don't know what's real anymore
@spacexsam: Forever tricking animals into thinking I'm patting them when really I'm just wiping crumbs off of my hands into their fur
@FilthyRichmond: If you're not supposed to abuse cough syrup then why does it come with a little plastic shot glass?