@theDanLawler: Maybe if Red Bull gave me buffalo wings i'd give a shit.
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@samfromks: Wife: Why the hell did you buy a buffalo? Me: I'd rather have a buffalo and not need it than need a buffalo and not have it.
@the_hawlk: SECURITY GUARD: "Sir, I have to check all backpacks" ME: "ok" *opens backpack* *its full of hundreds of tiny backpacks*
@Scott_A_Gilmore: I gave up and "folded" the fitted sheet into a rope so I could shimmy down from the 3rd floor to escape folding laundry.