@MrsMikePatton: Maybe if we press "2" for Spanish, we'll actually get someone that speaks English better then the person on the "1" line.
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@Playing_Dad: Reporter: Is there anything you can do to make people hate you more? Rodger Goodell: Coldplay is doing the Super Bowl halftime show.
@pleatedjeans: [angrily holding cookie under milk for way too long] Yo whatcha doin bro? [looks him dead in the eye] practicing for you
@EliTerry: It's kill or be killed. Or eat a sandwich. Maybe go for a light jog. Draw a picture of a duck. There are a lot of options out there.