@TheToddWilliams: Maybe she's boing with it. Maybe it's trampoline.
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@bathflyer: My boss always calls me Sweetypie when he wants me to get him coffee..I estimate he's swallowed a bucket of my spit in the last 4 years..
@OhNoSheTwitnt: Boss: I need you to work late. Me: [sprays her with Pepsi] B: You're fired. Me: So I don't have to work late? B: No. Me: [winks at camera]
@kwirkyKerri: I've never been offered money for sex. Never been offered money to not have sex either. So there's that.
@jaslakhmna: The new Exorcist movie plot: Family hires the devil to get a priest out of her son!