@noogscorner: Maybe that neighbor without a Wi-Fi password isn't an idiot. Maybe he's generous. And an idiot.
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@Underchilde: A man’s got to know his limitations. Unless he’s in a relationship, then he’ll be constantly reminded.
@AndyRichter: I ordered a toilet seat from Amazon and now based on the ads I see they must think I have an insatiable toilet seat addiction
@Parentpains: Surround yourself with people that can't handle their alcohol, so you can drink theirs after they pass out.