@VerifiedJayy: Maybe the Mayans were talking about hockey
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@huntigula: her: the manager of the McDonalds down the street called today... him: [sitting on couch next to Ronald McDonald statue] Did he sound mad?
@inikoblue: I just asked my friend to come over and "play husband". He's gonna be pissed when he finds out we are putting together shelves from ikea.
@envydatropic: First date - I'll have an ice water and a lettuce wedge Tenth date - I'll have a large pizza, extra cheese. What do you want, honey?
@Tmoney68: I ran without my headphones today & was reminded that I feel better about my fitness when my soundtrack isn't my panicked gasping breathing.