@MariyaAlexander: Maybe your jeans are distressed because you're wearing them?
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@FSUSteve: My iPhone just autocorrected the word nigga to NIGGA, like whoa iPhone. You can't just go around yelling the N word. Jesus.
@Nikkeya08: We're just two people shitting in side by side stalls waiting for the other person to go out so we don't have to show our face
@edana_irish: Why girls want to be mermaids 1. No pants 2. No periods 3. Perfect hair 4. You get to lure men to their deaths 5. Free clam bra
@man_spach: Whoever is bringing me the 3 dozen donuts each morning, thank you. But could you just leave them on my desk and not in the break room?