@MariyaAlexander: Maybe your jeans are distressed because you're wearing them?
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@XplodingUnicorn: My 3-year-old dumped pudding in her pocket. Novice dad reaction: "You ruined your pants." Veteran dad: "Thank God. I thought it was poop."
@LADaddy: The person who came up with "happily ever after" probably didn't realize humans would live longer than 34 years.
@jergarl: After 10 years of marriage I've composed a check list of good reasons to get married. 1) Your family is being held hostage. 2) 3)