@KhrisWarhol: McDonalds can't extend their breakfast hours because at 10:01am, the eggs become self aware.
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@RealLucasNeff: The ocean isn't shark-infested. It's the ocean. That's where sharks live. We aren't supposed to be there. Humans infest the ocean.
@Wussawilla: Remember when you first joined twitter and you had no idea how to RT or what favstar was and remembered what your family looked like?