@KhrisWarhol: McDonalds can't extend their breakfast hours because at 10:01am, the eggs become self aware.
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@CornOnTheGoblin: "You promise you didn't get me bees again" [me from a distance] just open it
@Jabba_Jabba_Jaw: Me to Dr: I have no energy lately. Dr: you need to exercise more Me:... Dr:... Me: Let's start this again.
@LittleMissZesty: Me: I'm not saying I hate your voice, but when you start talking, I understand the way dogs feel about fireworks. *howls* Co-worker:
@Leslie_Annie: 8 yr old: mommy, why are you laying on the floor? Me: I just did 438 sit ups. 8: sounds legit. I've taught her well.