@SirEviscerate: ME (a ghost): You know how Bill Nye used to say "don't try this at home"? Well, I did, and he kicked in the door and shot me in the face.
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@LoveNLunchmeat: Parenthood is where you spend 18 years saying no all because of that one critical time you said yes.
@vladchoc: For job interviews, your best bet is to dress as a pizza delivery person, march in and say "Who ordered DILIGENCE and ATTENTION TO DETAIL!?"
@LurkAtHomeMom: The good news is, it turns out there is literally nothing we can say here that will ruin our chances at a political career.
@thenatewolf: Date: my worst fear is not living up to my own expectations. You? Me: that if I ever lay across a piano while I'm singing it won't hold me.