@myconfusedface: Me and be Jealous?... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ... Who is McDonald's and why are you 'lovin it'?
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@bea_ker: [with father in law] "You know how to pluck a goose, son?" Er yes sir, sure do *stretches goose's neck and plays it like a double bass*
@WheelTod: Anytime I go to the doctors I feel so ripped off. Whatever my complaint is, it's always the same damn advice: "Lay off the methamphetamine."
@Elizasoul80: [slashing food truck tires] friend: wtf are you doing?! [running away with arms filled with tacos] YOU COMIN OR NOT?!