@ShesARealGenius: Me, at a romantic movie: pffft like that would ever happen
Me, at any other genre movie: YES I ABSOLUTELY ACCEPT THIS OUTLANDISH SCENARIO
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@thentherewasmo: Nicki Minaj is my favorite teletubby
@SortaBad: [karate tournament] coach: Billy sweep the leg! me in the crowd: haha hey billy vacuum his head! *Billy just wails opponent with a Dyson*
@hollyadkison: Okay just listen. A movie about a dancing puppy called Step Pup and its sequel Step Pup 2: the Treats.
@sonictyrant: GENIE: okay, 3 wishes ME: i want Sean Connery to recite She sells sea shells- GENIE: that's two ME: in the form of a rap SEAN CONNERY: {clears throat} gimme a shick beat
@TheSomeGuyShow: If you walk in on a girl giving birth in the bathroom at Applebees, don't judge her, you're also eating at Applebees.
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