@Carbosly: Me blacking out when I'm drunk is God's way of telling me that what I do when I drink is none of my business.
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@david8hughes: "So what kind of comedy will you be doing for us?" "The usual, self defecating." "Ha, I think you mean deprecating." "Think all you like."
@trevso_electric: "Jessica wasn't usually dead. So when we found her dead we immediately knew something was wrong." -Investigation Discovery
@TheTweetOfGod: "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free. Unless they're darker than, say, beige."- Statue of Liberty.