@Carbosly: Me blacking out when I'm drunk is God's way of telling me that what I do when I drink is none of my business.
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@kwirkyKerri: I'll agree to almost anything if you set a cupcake in front of me. I won't be listening. Because...cupcake.
@FrogAvalanche: News Anchor: Our correspondent at the scene had this to say. *cut to correspondent* Correspondent: This.
@shanethevein: Saw a grown man riding down the street on a BMX. I yelled what does BMX stand for? He replied "DUI".