@AngryRaccoon2: A Roomba, but to shave my legs.

@AndrewNadeau0: {God Creating Humans} Shave that monkey and make it complain about everything.

@StarksWeek: Accidentally ordered a large Coke from McDonalds. My Smart Car tipped over

@katiefzack: I dress like a murderer when I walk through the sketchy park outside my dorm so murderers will be like "Oh she's cool she's one of us."

@stevevsninjas: Take it from me; I have reverse kleptomania.