@LosLos__: Me: Gonna go see Gym.
Friend: You mean go to the gym?
Me: No, Gym is Geoff's brother.
@okaymachado: What do we want?
MORE EXISTENTIALIST JOKES!
When do we want them?
@Kyle_Lippert: A young Bruce Wayne falls into a cave full of pugs. He later becomes Pugman and keeps the streets of Gotham clean and downright adorable.
@myles_morrison: I can tell everything I need to know about a person by how they cut their sandwich.
Diagonal = normal
Straight = serial killer
No cut = dad
@see_more13: When I explained Twitter to my mother she said, "Sounds like group therapy where no one's getting better." Well played, Mom. Well played.
@JediGigi: Dating Profile
Favorite Food: Yes
Favorite Movie: Star Wars
Favorite Book: LOLZ