@ItMeIRL: me irl
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@sixfootcandy: I only had 3 goals in Monopoly as a kid: Dog game piece Boardwalk and Park Place. Steal your money when you go to the bathroom.
@Yung40Ounce: *Gets pulled over by cop* "Papers?" "Scissors" *Cop removes glasses* "Rocks?" *Both start successful trap house*
@iAmJuddy: Wifey: We should get a chest freezer. Me: We don't need a freezer that big. Wifey: What if we need to hide bodies? Me: I love you.