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@MindyFurano: me linking you to my twitter
@ch000ch: [ouija board] hi grandma, i hope your in heaven and i love you
@WowYoureFunny: If the doorbell rings, its normal to drop, shimmy across the floor, press your body to the wall & not breath till the person is gone, right?
@Coolisiana: I bet nobody noticed Superman flying around at first, so Clark just started pointing out every bird and plane until it caught on
@kelkulus: According to my laptop, my New Year's resolution is 1680 x 1050.
@TheBoydP: The old saying about pissed off waiters applies to everyone really. I’m fairly certain the guy at Home Depot just spit on my mulch.