@Kyle_Lippert: [Me narrating a documentary on spiders] OH GOD GROSS OH JESUS DISGUSTING THERE'S ONE ON ME RIGHT NOW ISN'T THERE OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD
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@Fred_Delicious: Bruce Willis is at the supermarket, standing by the cucumbers & laughing hysterically, pointing at them with tears streaming down his face
@velvettusk: ♫ Is this the real life? Are you a manatee? Let’s beat up french fries I should lay off the LSD ♫
@One_FineMess: Black, white, gay, straight, Christian, Jewish... It doesn't matter. It's all good. But a Pepsi drinker...